Trying to deal with husband's affair

[AS300]

I posted a while back about how to deal with my husband who has had a 1.5+ year affair. Not much has changed I am afraid... I still think he may be seeing her. But he denies it. I have been living in this sorrow for over a year - when I first suspected it, but he didn't really confess until 2 months ago. I just don't feel I am strong enough to take some serious steps to rectify the situation. Sometimes I think I should ask him to leave until he can convince me that that affair is over. But I really don't want to be alone. But I don't to live in this isolated sorrow and doubt either. I just don't know how to put my marriage back together. My husband is a good, Christian man and a good father. I just worry that he is caught in an addicition and can't find the way out.

Just needing to reach out.... thanks.

[hisredeemed]

You're husband is not behaving like a good Christian man. He's cheating and making a mockery of what God holds holy.

He is also not modeling holiness as a good Christian father is called to do.

1Co 10:13

No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.

It angers me when ppl claim to be good Christians while they are selfishly satisfying outright sins of the flesh. There is no excuse for his behavior.

He's behaving extremely immaturely! He's hurting you and your child. He's leaving his family open to the enemy. He needs to get on his face before God and ask for forgiveness and STOP cheating! He owes God and you a huge apology for acting like an unrestrained teenager.

In the meantime, you need to get some godly counseling for you and our child, pronto.

[larry]

Dear Father, please help this dear sister have the wisdom to know Your will. She loves her husband, and has a forgiving heart, but You know the hurt she is feeling. Please bring her the peace she needs in her decision to remain with him, help her know Your will for her, and give her the strength to perform it. Work in her husband’s heart to know the hurt he is giving her, and restore the love he needs for her also. You have made them one, so please bring a love to them both, that You have for us. Comfort her now with the love, and knowledge she needs at this time in knowing that You are right there with her, and are working all things for her good. Thank You Father for hearing this prayer in the blessed name of Your Son Jesus. Amen.

May God bless you AS300 in the days ahead to continue to trust Him for the answer to your problem. He will never leave or forsake us, hears our prayers, and cares for us like no other. Praise God in the wonderful name of Jesus - larry :)

[crossway7]

I am not sure if you want to hear from another male but I can relate to marriage troubles and how God is working in my marriage. I for years was being taught by God the cross and what that meant. I did experience my own cross through situations in my marriage. If you want victory you will have to let God focus on you. It is only by your own personal cross and that experience you will have victory. I can share more but I encourage you to pray about the cross. Ask God to bring into your marriage. Remember the cross is both experiencing the death of Christ and the life of Christ. The sorrow you may be experiening is something I can relate to. If it is the same I know it brings you to your knees. You cannot talk but only cry. Sounds and pain come from your inner most being. This does not sound good but it is actually a gift of Godly sorrow. The pain is trying to speak to you. God is actually sharing his pain of an unamed sin. Ask God for help in naming the sin. Nail it to the cross and receive your healing. Do not perish for lack of knowledge. It is the work of the cross your experiencing proceed with naming the sin. You might have asked to know the heart of God like David. Well, now you know what sin does to God it causes a broken heart. The pain you feel does not belong to you but the cross. Name it and nail it!!!

[Cynthia_smiles]

AS300,
Your husband has an affair equals mistreating his wife...you are the wife.. your are being mistreated...how does that make you feel.... what do you think of yourself for staying... what would you think of yourself for leaving..?
The BIBLE says you can leave an adulter; therefore there is no right answer..your husband is a broke man; however that does not make you a broken woman... your son needs a stable person raising him....how stable are either your or your husband at this time.... your husband can take responsbility for himself... you take responsibility for yourself... your son is too young to take responsbility for himself....I pray that you reach a decision that takes care of you and I pray you reach a decision that takes care of your son. I pray that you find peace.

[LukeW]

Try to be strong in your faith and pray for your husband daily. I recently redidicate my life to Christ and confessed my infidelity to my wife I hope and pray she will stand by me the way you have stood by your husban. Remember Good things come to those that Love the Lord and you can do anything through the strength of Jesus Chirst

[ProfMan]

Dear sister,
I am so sorry to hear about your pain. My wife and I have been separated for over two years and I did every thing I could to reconcile, but she just refused and now she is having some kind of affair. There really is nothing like the pain of being rejected and betrayed. It sucks, no bones about it. But the Lord has been teaching me to wait for his plan, to trust him and lean on him when I don't even want to get out of bed. My wife claims to be a Christian and her parents are ministers but I struggle to reconcile their statements of belief and their actions of disobedience (her parents told her to leave me and support her having a relationship with this other "christian" man even though the scriptures do not support it). At first I was filled with so much anger, which always led to sorrow, but now that doesn't happen as much (still happens every day though). I read your sadness and my heart aches with knowing. All I can say is that the Lord is using this in your life and mine to make us more like Christ. He knows more than any of us what it is to be rejected and betrayed by those who were supposed to love him. May you walk with him and feel his strong arms holding you close, and may he give you wisdom in caring for your children. Grace and peace to you.

[tom]

I've been that guy. I had an afair after a long unhappy marriage. I promis you that if he thought he was unhappy before, he is misserable now. He has a wound. It probably happened years before you ever met. Until he deals with the wound, he cannot move forward, and he needs to for your sake. I am dealing with my wound, but my wife is so hurt that she no longer loves or trusts me. I am lonelier than ever. Get to a counselor and your minister. I'm praying for you.