guys? submission?

[WhiterThanSnow]

I'm spending the weekend with the girls:af and we were discussing some things. It seems like a lot of times Christian guys percieve a girl as being submissive if she rarley talks and just smiles and nods :-) . Are guys intimidated by a girl who thinks? When Jesus prayed in the garden He said, 'nevertheless Father, not My will but Thine.' This means He may have had a will in some earthly sense, but He desired the will of the Father more. He is the prefect example of submission. I would think this would be the perfect picture for a husband and wife coming together and the wife being the submissive one. The two have wills, but one is called to lay thiers down. Now what it seems like, is that guys are looking for a girl who has no will at all but then what is there to submit? The women at our church who have a passion for theology or apologetics or politics or whatever else are almost looked at like some sort of feminist or something:-O . I hope I'm wrong about this but over time we've seen the same pattern and I'm beginning to wonder if I should take less interst in these things or at least not talk about it to the guys (of coarse I never would but is that what's expected?) Anyway, just wanted to hear your thoughts on this because we could be totally reading into things. Thanks a lot and may God be glorified in all of us! :)

[Lance]

I'm spending the weekend with the girls:af and we were discussing some things. It seems like a lot of times Christian guys percieve [sic] a girl as being submissive if she rarley [sic] talks and just smiles and nods :-) . Are guys intimidated by a girl who thinks? When Jesus prayed in the garden He said, 'nevertheless Father, not My will but Thine.' This means He may have had a will in some earthly sense, but He desired the will of the Father more. He is the prefect example of submission. I would think this would be the perfect picture for a husband and wife coming together and the wife being the submissive one. The two have wills, but one is called to lay thiers [sic] down. Now what it seems like, is that guys are looking for a girl who has no will at all but then what is there to submit? The women at our church who have a passion for theology or apologetics or politics or whatever else are almost looked at like some sort of feminist or something:-O . I hope I'm wrong about this but over time we've seen the same pattern and I'm beginning to wonder if I should take less interst [sic] in these things or at least not talk about it to the guys (of coarse I never would but is that what's expected?) Anyway, just wanted to hear your thoughts on this because we could be totally reading into things. Thanks a lot and may God be glorified in all of us! :)

My wife guarded her words carefully and when she opened her mouth it was because she had something worthwhile to say but she was definitely not submissive. Choosing a suitable partner involves a great deal of research and selectivity. Any guy who will not go along with this is best dropped at the earliest opportunity. It is best to be mushy after the selection. :)

[germanJoy]

While men are gifted with logic, we women are gifted with emotions. Thus, men in most circumstances activitate their brains while women their hearts. While their strength is our weakness, our strength is their weakness. God has made us totally different from one another for a purpose. He wants us to be dependent with each other and by this dependence, we become inseparable. Joining our forces together will enable us to fulfill God's perfect plan in our marriages by being not just "one flesh" but also one spirit and one mind.

Men like neither robotical nor weakling wives. They (christian men) hope for being married to strong-willed women filled with God's Spirit and led by God's Word. A loving husband brings forth a submissive wife and vice-versa (a submissive wife brings forth a loving husband). If you do your part, he will also do his... if any one of you fails, both will fail... thus "one flesh". :-)

God bless your weekend with the girls, WhiterThanSnow. :-)

[mhusoy]

I'm spending the weekend with the girls:af and we were discussing some things. It seems like a lot of times Christian guys percieve a girl as being submissive if she rarley talks and just smiles and nods :-) .

Hey sister WhiterThanSnow

I'm not sure if christian guys thinks a lot about submission when they are together with girls, like they're watching the girls to see if they are submissive.. at least I don't.. also I don't percieve a girl as being submissive if she is quiet.. some persons are, btw more girls than boys are the quiet kind, which may have many reasons, like biological (man and woman were created with different qualities)

Are guys intimidated by a girl who thinks? When Jesus prayed in the garden He said, 'nevertheless Father, not My will but Thine.' This means He may have had a will in some earthly sense, but He desired the will of the Father more. He is the prefect example of submission.

Guys love girls who think, we're all humans, with a brain capacity that God has blessed us with. Yes, Jesus submitted to God, Jesus accepted the will of God before his own. Jesus was submissive to his Father, and he is a good example for all of us, men and women, since also we are the children of God when we believe in the name of Jesus. Jesus also told us to pick up our cross every day and deny our own will and lusts, extreme submission.

I would think this would be the perfect picture for a husband and wife coming together and the wife being the submissive one. The two have wills, but one is called to lay thiers down. Now what it seems like, is that guys are looking for a girl who has no will at all but then what is there to submit?

Yes sister. That is a perfect picture, because God has told us to do so. There cannot be two lords, so one must submit. The bible tells us that the wife must submit to her husband. That doesn't mean that the will of the husband should rule, rather the will of God, as the husband still has to submit to God, in the same manner as the wife. Before God man and woman are equals, in Christ. But because of the unity of two into one (through marriage, one flesh) one has to submit. So - though the wife should submit to the husband, both must submit to God, so that leaves out a husbands tyranny.

I cannot speak for others than myself, but I'm certainly not looking for a girl that has no will, for the reason you stated - then how would there be a submission? In the marriage, God has given us an example, a divine picture: Jesus and the church, man and wife. So a wife should submit to her husband, and the husband should give his life for his wife (like Jesus did for us). And remember; Jesus came to serve us, and eventually die for us. He even washed the disciples feet - and so the husband should follow Christ in these things.

The women at our church who have a passion for theology or apologetics or politics or whatever else are almost looked at like some sort of feminist or something:-O . I hope I'm wrong about this but over time we've seen the same pattern and I'm beginning to wonder if I should take less interst in these things or at least not talk about it to the guys (of coarse I never would but is that what's expected?) Anyway, just wanted to hear your thoughts on this because we could be totally reading into things. Thanks a lot and may God be glorified in all of us! :)

I think that it is rather strange that those passionate woman are looked down on (feminism). God has used woman throughout the ages, though not as pastors or highest leaders. But there were woman as prophets and missionaries. So women can be used by God in these ways, although only men can be pastors or main leaders.

To you sister, God has given you qualities and interests, and you shouldn't easily, without prayer and consideration, leave those things. God may have given those qualities to you, so that you might use them for His kingdom. Don't be afraid to talk to guys about such things. Out of what I can read in this post, it seems that you're looking for a guy. Then of course you should direct your behaviour in the way you think is the best vs the guy you want (as do we guys when we're interested in a particular girl). But still, don't deny your personality, be true of who you are, and you might find the guy that finds this pleasing. Your attitude on submission according to the Word of God, should easily give you access to the hearts of many God-loving men.

So, God bless you sister, and use the qualities God has given you while you're searching for His will for your life.


your brother in Christ

mhusoy

[WhiterThanSnow]

I'm so bummed. I just wrote a lengthy response to you mhusoy, and somehow lost it when I went to spell check (I guess I should just learn how to spell). Anyway, thank you so much for the response. It was encouraging and I will share this with the others as well. How is Norway? You might be the only one I've ever talked to that has heard my last name before. Maybe I will write more later but I need to get going. I pray God uses you greatly for His name's sake. Thanks again! :)

[Lance]

I'm so bummed. I just wrote a lengthy response to you mhusoy, and somehow lost it when I went to spell check ........
I know just how you feel WhiterThanSnow. This board doesn't like my spell checker at all and louses up the formatting. You have my sympathy.

PS. It is surprising how often ‘CTRL Z’ recovers data when one thinks it is lost forever.

[WhiterThanSnow]

Thanks for the sympathy and the tip. Just have to laugh, ha?

[mhusoy]

I'm so bummed. I just wrote a lengthy response to you mhusoy, and somehow lost it when I went to spell check (I guess I should just learn how to spell). Anyway, thank you so much for the response. It was encouraging and I will share this with the others as well. How is Norway? You might be the only one I've ever talked to that has heard my last name before. Maybe I will write more later but I need to get going. I pray God uses you greatly for His name's sake. Thanks again! :)


Norway is good... I'm good... people here are good materially, but generally not spirtitually..

what's your last name sister?


your brother in Christ

mhusoy

[OneJoe]

Pro 31:10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
Pro 31:11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
Pro 31:12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
Pro 31:13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
Pro 31:14 She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar.
Pro 31:15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.
Pro 31:16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.
Pro 31:17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.
Pro 31:18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
Pro 31:19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.
Pro 31:20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.
Pro 31:21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
Pro 31:22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.
Pro 31:23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.
Pro 31:24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.
Pro 31:25 Strength and honor are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
Pro 31:26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
Pro 31:27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
Pro 31:28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
Pro 31:29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
Pro 31:30 Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
Pro 31:31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.